Table of Contents
- 1 What Can You Do to Get Your Life in Order?
- 2 Getting Back on Track- Conclusion
Calm and relaxed life | Interview with Thijs LaunspachThijs Launspach (1988) is a Dutch psychologist, author and trainer.
Thijs is an expert on stress management, burnout and millennials. He’s written several books on these subjects. His latest book on stress and burn-out, Fokking druk (‘Effing busy’) was released at Spectrum in October 2018. Earlier books include Het Millennial Manifest (‘The Millennial Manifesto’, 2017) and Quarterlife (2012).
Thijs specializes in millennials and burn-outs in the Netherlands. He’s a public speaker, a guest lecturer and a regular guest in talk shows.
Thijs has taught classes at the University of Amsterdam and currently teaches at the School of Life. His company – in which he helps people achieve a more calm and relaxed life – is called the Rustburo.
There comes a time in everybody’s life when you question, “how to get my life in order?” looking for answers to bring structure to your life once and for all. Little happenings and significant life events every day challenge you emotionally. But, most importantly, those moments bring negative repercussions. This makes you feel as if everything around you is falling apart, and you lose all your control over it.
It makes you feel overwhelmed and frazzled in these times. You may feel like you are even struggling to breathe. Plans get derailed, people let you down, and your dreams crash under the chaos and stress of it all. But, whatever the situations are, it doesn’t mean you have to carry on being a victim of the occurrences and let your life slide down from your hands.
You can take possible actionable steps to get your life in order if you wish to try. It is possible to turn your life around even when things look exceptionally doleful.
Leaving the chaotic life behind is not an overnight change. However, it is not impossible. It is something that can be done. It is a journey that you have to take and give time to experience your share of moments along the way.
The words like ‘later,’ ‘tomorrow,’ and ‘someday’ are the ones that have killed more dreams than anything else. If you follow them, you might have to wait for your whole life to get it back. Procrastination gives you the excuse to forget essential things or let them pile up until you get a mountain of problems out of a molehill. Then you struggle to put something together while dealing with the different issues created by your inaction.
Thus, live proactively rather than reactively. Please don’t put off things later, and do them as soon as you can. It helps you clear them off your mind and move ahead to more important things.
One of the most important ways to think straight is to organize your life. When you wish to build anything of quality and substance, it needs direction and time. Planning and execution of the plan require organization. With prioritization and organization, you can plan what and what needs to get done and when.
If everything remains a mess around you, then you won’t get a chance to get your thoughts straight ever. So, declutter your mental as well as physical space.
As Jim Rohn stated that you become the average of the five people you spend the most time with, it points out how people you surround yourself with can influence you. It is pretty tough to maintain a positive attitude while staying focused on your objectives is encompassed by cynical, bitter people. You can’t expect to make any progress if the people around you belittle your efforts and you constantly.
However, you must understand who all are referred to as ‘toxic’ people before cutting them out. A toxic person is genuinely causing harm to your well-being. Though it’s a calculated effort, sometimes the person struggles with their issues, and it gets damaging for the people around them to an extreme extent. Sometimes you have to become understanding and kind. But, ensure boundaries in your relationships to prevent toxic people from screwing up your happiness and life.
Adequate sleep, regular exercise, and a healthy diet can significantly benefit your emotional and mental health and well-being. It is pretty hard to feel good about yourself and your life if you constantly feel lethargic and run down. But, contrary to popular perception, you don’t need to live a natural and super expensive lifestyle to get the benefits. Even small steps taken to change your routine can help to get your body into a healthier place. For instance, cutting out on caffeine and sugar can help you sleep better at night and improve your overall energy levels.
Make time in your daily routine for some exercise. A walk for only 20 minutes a few times a week can benefit your heart health, brain health, and internal chemical production. Physical activity helps to improve the quality of your sleep and benefits both your mental and physical health.
Chasing validation and external happiness is a constant race that will take you nowhere. The happiness after running is in the form of external things, and it is not genuine happiness. Whatever you pursue, whether you buy new things, seek external pleasure, or put the substance in your body, they are all temporary doses of dopamine and endorphins. You’d believe that you would be happy only if you have this or that. They will last for a short while.
Sooner or later, that happiness will fade, and you will start looking for other things to boost good feel chemicals in your brain. But, unfortunately, it traps you into the vicious cycle of chasing stuff just for the sake of having them because you think that it will give you pleasure.
Happiness is the thing that should come from within the person. It is peaceful and beautiful. You will find it when you start accepting and being okay with yourself. Also, it will come with your contentment with what and where you are at present. However, it should not stop from achieving more. Remember not to depend your happiness on them—practice gratitude for what you have.
Talk to the person with whom you connect heart to heart, letting all your emotions out. Sharing will ease the burden. First, you need to clarify why you are talking in the first place, like whether you are talking to find solutions, process the emotions related to the issues, or simply just for the sake of talking. Unstoppably complaining about your life is draining and is a waste of time, accomplishing nothing of value.
Rumination is the process of continuously thinking about the same negative, sad, or dark thoughts repeatedly, causing you to spiral deeper into your issues. It can cause additional stress, also worsening anxiety and depression. This is the result of complaining without any constructive goal. Of course, nobody stops you from venting out, but doing that repeatedly won’t help you accomplish anything.
It will be impractical to expect your life to go from its present to your dream life in a jiff. Your dream may remain a dream forever as it is perfect in all the little details. You need to swallow the bitter pill that Perfection doesn’t exist in the real world. So instead, aim to make progress on the essential things that will take you to a point where you can enjoy your life. Aim to make things from bad to okay, then okay to fine, excellent, and fantastic.
Take your goals step-by-step instead of rushing them. Whether it’s your profession, health, or personal life, keep making the momentum moving. You are sure to face setbacks, but when it happens, always return to improving the circumstances and focus on progressing.
If you don’t plan for your financial needs in the future and don’t stay within your means, you will eventually face difficulties. But, amidst all the things life throws at you, the last thing you want is to get into financial trouble. It doesn’t mean that you have to deny yourself the simple pleasure of life. But you must know when to show restraint and choose the same.
You must ensure to have a secure financial future to cut down your worries. Budget carefully to ensure what goes out doesn’t cross what comes in. be careful with your expenditure. Being frugal will provide you well no matter what your income is. It helps to ease the burden and stress and helps you put your life in order.
Everyone fears the unknown that holds you from getting back on track and enjoying your life with little happy things. Work to overcome all your fears if you want to pull your life together after a devastating experience. Nevertheless, it is possible sometimes that it can’t eliminate all those fears. And in such conditions, you accept them and learn to live with them moving on, making progress.
Bouncing back to life when it may seem to fall apart is possible. You have to take some actionable steps and practice healthy habits to help you rise from the ashes and back on track, enjoying your life once again happily.
Everybody experiences tough times or takes the blow at some point in their life. But, the vital thing to do is pull yourself up and your life in order rather than letting those negative emotions take the best of you.